My demon arises every 6 months or so, reminding me that something has happened and it wasn't was my fault. I don't have memories, I have post traumatic stress and dreams. It has increased over the years, and with every year that passes, I feel more and more guilt, shame, and irresponsibility in my personal relationships. I also regain more memory as the years pass. That small little dick with a fat belly rubbing against my back. I know my panties were on at first, and my nightgown always stayed on. The room was blue. I started wearing socks to bed, as if they would protect me. I started sleeping with the hall light on, but he didn't live in my home. I remember being scolded for fondling my friend at 7. I don't know why I would do that. I remember feeling aroused when my other friend and I played babies as we breastfed them. I regularly used my stuffed animals for stimulation. My dreams now consist of being little, naked, and helpless. Sometimes I am an adult. There is usually a man exposing himself, unassuming like. That's all for now. Good night.
